In any event, I was faced with yet another new challenge yesterday, one that I have been lucky enough to avoid for the most part thus far, when Av sustained her very first bloody wound. Kids getting hurt is an inevitability. They are clumsy, careless, hyper and, especially at this age, completely lack the ability to remain balanced when traveling quickly. Therefore I knew there would come a day, probably sooner than later, when Av would end up hurting herself worse than the usual bump on the head she gets from running around like an idiot and not paying attention. That day was yesterday.
We were playing in the house like we do most mornings while I made my usual futile attempt to pick up a little bit and get the baby dressed. Av was in the midst of her daily 'I'm not going to let you put my shirt on' act and was running around the house half naked trying to avoid me. I don't much care for this game but at the same time it doesn't really upset me either. Eventually I just wrap her up and get the shirt on. But yesterday was a little bit different as she took off running for her playroom and attempted a swan dive in to a pile of pillows laying on the floor. Usually she hops on those pillows and plays with her stuffed animals but today she was moving a little bit too fast and over shot the pile, slamming head first in to a bookshelf like an Olympic diver missing the pool. The sound was disgusting and she immediately started to cry, but somehow I did not freak out. I calmly went over and picked her up and started checking her out for cuts and bruises. As soon as I turned her head I noticed that she had blood all the way down the side of her face and started frantically looking for the cut. It was not too long before I realized that she had sustained a nasty gash right above her left eye. She looked kind of like this:
To her credit, Av stopped crying almost immediately and did a good job of letting me clean up the blood. In fact, I had barely been able to get a good look at it before she had wrestled away from me and attempted to go back to playing. I took a good look at the gash and noticed that it was about an inch long, right in her eyebrow but not terribly deep. Even better, there was almost no swelling. At this point I began to ask myself if I should take her to the ER. It is important to note that I really, really did not want to do that. I made three phone calls, one to Monica, one to my mother an one to the doctor's office nurse advice line. I played down the cut a bit too Monica and my mother because I didn't want to freak them out, and both said she should be fine as long as she was acting normal and the bleeding had stopped. It had. In fact, she was running around again a short time after and making me nervous.
Before I called the doctor's office I made up my mind that unless they tell me it is absolutely dire I was not taking her to the ER. Let's explore the reasons why. As many of you know, the ER is the most miserable place on the planet. I have been to the ER 3-4 times in my life and I have never had a good experience. The past two times, once for serious food poisoning obtained in Mexico and the second for a potential kidney stone, I sat in the waiting room for hours and was never seen. After the Mexico trip I was convinced I was going to die. I thought for sure that I had one of those 'Monsters Inside Me' parasites that was eating away at my organs. I eventually recovered about two weeks later, but I did so by pure luck as I was essentially refused medical attention. (I sat in the ER for 5 hours, next to a woman who was stroking out. They still hadn't gotten to her when I left). As for the kidney stone, I'm almost positive that I passed that in the ER bathroom while I was waiting that day. I have never had a kidney stone before and I was never officially diagnosed (although the nurse said that was 'probably' my issue before banishing me to watch soap operas in purgatory for the rest of the day) but I was in massive pain for hours in the waiting room. Eventually, I got up and took the most painful, burning piss ever- and felt 100 percent better immediately after. I walked out of the bathroom, right out the door and went to work. Thanks, ER. On both occasions they attempted to charge me $100. For no care. Both times they tore up the bill, but that isn't the point.
Anyway, all I could picture was Av and I sitting in a waiting room for hours, her causing all sorts of trouble and fussing, just so I could pay $100 for them to put some hospital strength Neosporin and a band aid on it. No thanks. So I called the nurse and, again, understated the situation. She told me the baby was fine but I needed to go to the ER to prevent scarring. Yeah, ok, scarring. She is 2. And the cut is on her eyebrow. I'll take my chances. Not to mention, I don't really need the pressure of convincing some bitch nurse that I didn't punch her in the face. I reiterate- the medical industry is a complete scam.
Armed with Neosporin, alcohol wipes and some 'boo boo stickers' I went to town on Av's eye. She hated the alcohol part but loved the cream and the 'sticker.' She walked around the rest of the day with a slightly swollen eye, a band aid and a 'don't f with me attitude.' She seriously thinks she is the coolest kid on the block now.
To be perfectly honest, I am kind of proud of myself. Faced with a scary situation I didn't freak out, I managed to prevent her from freaking out and I didn't over react and take her to the ER. A day later she thinks having a boo boo is pretty cool, except for the alcohol part, and the cut is already starting to shrink. That said, I hope I don't have to face this adversity again for a long time. I already get nervous whenever I see her going near those pillows.
A few housekeeping notes
As you may have noticed often times in this space I tend to drift off on rants about popular culture, sports, music etc... I have decided that those rants will have a new home in the form of a separate spin off blog. This will contain all non-baby related content as well as the weekly music section at the bottom of the page. I feel like this will help both myself and the reader have more of a clear focus for both blogs. I haven't had time to start the second one yet, but when I do I will post the live link here.
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