Maybe it was her cabin fever, or maybe she was just having a really good time, but Av didn't want to leave today. I don't blame her, really, it isn't like we had anything else to do. The point is that a lot can happen in two hours when you are trapped inside a 100 square foot carpeted warehouse filled with giant inflatable mazes. And a lot happened, indeed.
The MJ's trip actually got off to such a poor start that it looked like we were 10 minutes and done, but somehow we managed to rally. Av decided that she was going to try out one of the bigger kid apparatus, which I supported given her lack of coordination and ability to tackle challenges with confidence. I figured she could handle the big guy thing and everything would be ok. We were good for a while until she decided that she wanted to go in to what she called the 'house' but was really just a long tube that led to a maze that led out the other side. In order to get to the 'house' she had to climb over some tiny inflated squares that were tightly placed together. In other words, they were impassable unless she scaled them. Getting over the tiny squares went surprisingly well, but when she realized she wasn't tall enough to climb in to the house panic set in. Disappointed and a little tired she turned around and tried to go back, but for some reason felt like she was trapped.
For some unknown reason this time she decided that she didn't have it in her to scale the inflated cubes and she decided she was going to wedge herself through them. Of course, she got stuck. Keep in mind that I am watching this through a mesh window. I can't help her as I have no way of physically getting to her unless I climb in to the maze myself from the other side, a strict no-no at MJ's. She started to cry when she realized I couldn't help her and I thought for sure I was going to have to go get the 'referee' to come get her out. But then I remembered that she made it over to that side herself, so I wasn't going to let her give up. Like Mick training Rocky I encouraged her through her tears and her unwillingness to scale the cubes. She was literally stuck and crying for over 10 minutes, no exaggeration. I somehow stayed supportive and didn't let the fact that she was making a scene bother me. 10 minutes. 10. She was stuck on the cubes crying for 10 minutes. She finally got over them, fell flat on her face and struggled to get out, snot running down her face and tears in her eyes. I thought we were done. But as she emerged from the apparatus she greeted me simply with 'Hi Daddy!' and ran over to another one that she had never been in before. Confused, yet proud, I wiped her nose and we went on our way.
We were having a fun time in the new, yet less challenging bouncer for some time when some other kids decided to come up. Most of you are aware that other people's children are my worst nightmare. I don't like associating with them, I don't like befriending them and I certainly don't like it when I have to touch them. Unfortunately for me, I appeared to be the only adult adhering to MJ's 'adult supervision' rule, and the entrance to this particular apparatus was very slippery.
It started with one polite little boy who was struggling to get up. Her turned to me and said, very nicely, "Hi. Can you help me?" So I looked around, saw that it was cool and gave him a boost. This opened up the flood waters. For the next five minutes I became the designated booster of small children in to the bouncy thing. Sweet. I was just waiting for the moms to start scolding me. Luckily for me, none of them were paying any attention anyway.
It was at or about this time that Av made a friend. A real life, met at MJ's friend. This girl was probably three or four, a little busted, kind of chubby with a purple sweat suit and Ramen Noodle hair. Yes, I am aware that the previous sentence is extremely mean, especially when referring to a toddler. No, I don't care. I know that this girl and Av were 'friends' because the girl told me, several times, and then gave Av a hug. The hug was very sweet. The first time.
The girl followed Av around for a bit, talking her ear off, apparently not noticing that she was a 2-year-old who only puts together sentence fragments. Av seemed ok enough with her, so it was cool but the hugging. Oh, the hugging was constant. After a bit I started to look around for this one's mother. At one point another lady asked her where her mother was because she wanted a lift to the water fountain. She pointed to a bench where an old woman was seated and said, 'That's Grandma."
Now, I am sure that Grandma was very nice, but she looked like Mac's mom on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
She was wearing a hoodless sweatshirt, wind pants, sketchers and a permanent scowl. She never spoke, but I imagine if she did she would have sounded like she swallowed a box of nails in the back room of a cigar shop. Again, could have been the nicest lady in the world, but that is what she looked like.Av and the other girl frolicked around for a bit, having fun. Tom Petty's 'In to the Great Wide Open' started playing as they bounced around and laughed and it seemed eerily appropriate. Everyone was having a good time.
Then the hugging went to far. It was borderline toddler sexual assault, actually. Every time someone would come over to play the little girl would grab Av, squeeze her in a bear hug and say she is MY friend. It reminded me of those commercials warning teenagers not to date controlling dudes who text you all day (yeah, because it is always the teenage dude who is the crazy possessive one, right? Have these people ever BEEN to a high school?). The final straw was when the little girl went to give Av a kiss. Av turned away, the girl grabbed her arm and pulled her, kissing the first available place on my struggling daughter. Humorously enough, this was on her giant, diaper- effect bubble ass because Av was in the process of diving in to the fetal position to ward off the advances.
It was at this point that Av turned to be and said 'bye bye Monkey Joe's" and made me pick her up. I said to the little girl "It was nice meeting you, but we have to go now." She ran over to her grandmother and she was gone. Then Av said "No home? Monkey Joe's?" and I realized that her 2-year-old brain just formulated a lie to get out of an uncomfortable situation. This makes me proud, again. I will feel slightly more comfortable when she goes to high school.
As time went on I started to feel a little bad for the other kid, who clearly lacks affection and friendship. Still, no one goes to MJ's to make out on the toddler bounce, so she needs to back off.
The stay was smooth from there and we briefly encountered the rapist again on the carousel, but everything was under control there. Hard to hug when you are spinning on a horse.
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